There Ain't No Devil, It's Just God When He's Drunk

Now, I like to think of myself as a very UN-hater...a lover, an optimist, and a good karmaist. But that being said, there are some things in life that I just HATE and can do nothing about. Two of them happened today.

1) Being trapped on the other side of the street when your bus arrives and not being able to run across to catch it because of cars of death that won't stop to let you make it. *&%"&£%&*$^ how I hate that! Since J-Walking isn't illegal in the UK (at least as far as I know), everyone just waits to dash across the road. At the hospital, the bus stop is conveniently directly across the road...across the very busy road...and while there is a crosswalk, it's about 25 yards up the road, meaning I would just be backtracking, and no one wants to do that.

2) Mixed car messages. This happened to me in the parking lot. It was a double lane and there were two cars coming my way. One of them looked like it was going to stop and let me go, the other was reving it's engine. When Car 1 rolled to a stop, I made like I was about to cross the street, but then Car 2 started reving it's engine, so I thought I would just let them pass instead, but then Car 1 was waving his hand for me to go, so I did, causing Car 2 to rev some more and then gun the engine when I was just a hairsbreadth out of his lane so he could jump in front of nice Car 1. And this was in a parking lot. Of a hospital. Where sick kids and people in wheelchairs and crutches walk/roll/hobble. Grrrrrrrrrrr...

Watch this space, I am sure that there will be plenty more life hates coming your way.

So I had a sudden thought the other day while sitting in the back seat of Scottie's newish car (aka the one his brother gave his after getting an even newerish one from Grandpa who can now no longer see). We were trying to navigate back from Po's (aka Scottie's brother who is in the Edinburgh Police Force) and in order to do so, had to enter one roundabout, quickly take the second exit to immediately enter a second roundabout, to then take an immediate left out into some more swoopies and loops. Seriously, the thing would have been SO much easier and made SO much more sense if these British people believed in the linear logic of 4-way stops.

Anyway, just as we were entering this insane loopy, roundabout nonsense, I was chatting to Poppa Bear (aka the Dad) about the differences in writing papers in the UK verses the US. In the US, I was taught a very linear and straight forward formula for essays: the 5 paragraph essay. This formulaic method of (Intro+Thesis) x(1st paragraph of proof to prove Thesis) x (2nd paragraph to prove Thesis) x (3rd paragraph to prove Thesis) + Conclusion = essay. You introduced your topic, made the claim you were out to prove, and gave evidence of proof. Done. Not so much in the UK. The UK is a lot more tentative about everything and operates under the idea that nothing is true. Therefore, when writing an essay, you have to propose your thesis as oppose to state it, and suggest how your proposition might be correct, while also making sure to mention that you are aware of all the other arguments that exist which might counter your own idea.

The cat is hungry because it was locked in a closet all day.

There are many theories about why the cat is hungry. While some have argued that the cat's hunger might be due to the cat having missed out on dinner the previous night, this paper will suggest that the real reason the can is hungry is because it was locked in a closet all day. However, it also recognises that there might have been additional factors which contributed to the cats hunger.

You get there eventually, but it's a twisty, convoluted way that could have been avoided if you were allowed to be direct. Just like their damn roads!

Is this further insight to the British brain? Can you understand a culture better based on their road planning and engineering? Should I just finish this port already and go to bed?

People, as much as you like your little roundabouts, they are USELESS, do NOT facilitate traffic, and only help more people get hit by cars. Fricken own up and adopt the stop sign...there ain't nothing wrong with thinking STRAIGHT.